a month of reflection

August is about to end and as I look back, it was the pain and the joy to look once again to the month of turbulence and troubles.

1. final had just been done. i hope i got high grades. i can't afford another screw-up.

2. ano kaya ang matimbang? 12 years of knowing each other or 4 years of cold friendship? ewan ko ba. people tend to forget all the goodness of a person and always remember all the bad and ugly. di ko alam kung sino may problema kung ako nga ba o sila na.

3. para kay V.A.P. - PUTANG INA MO!!!! MAMATAY KA NA AT MASUNOG KA SA IMPIERNO!!! ISA KANG MALAKING PLASTIC SA MUKHA NG MUNDO!!!

4. sa mga taong may talagang pakailam sa akin, maraming maraming salamat sa inyo. sana huwag kayong makain ng mga sinasabi ng ibang tao. kilala ninyo ako sa simula't-simula pa lamang. huwag kayo sanang padadala sa mga ihip ng hangin.

5. ikaw na nga lang ang tutulong, napapasama ka pa. bakit kaya ganun ang tao? misunderstanding nga ba o natapakan ko mga pride at ego nila? aba ewan, di ko naman sila ka-utak eh. basta nasabi ko ang gusto kong sabihin. huwag sana nilang damdamin.

6. salamat sa mga phonemates ko sa pakikinig ng mga problema ko sa buhay. hayy sorry kung mistulang dr. love na kayo sa akin. hehe. i do appreciate all your cares for me as a friend.

7. i'm not sure kung makakaya ko pa work ko sa school paper, sa school, sa church at sa bahay. i feel i'm straining my health because of work overload at sa kakaisip ng kung anu-ano. maybe i should go to a personal retreat, away from all problem and be like the buddha for one day in my life.

8. for those who are asking, "who am i to are speak at them like that?" well, i'm some darn old fool wanting for a change in the institution i've loved and embraced. who doesn't want a change? you think change is something by a trinkle? hell no. change is drastic and cataclysmic. look at what happened to industrial revolution, the age of enlightenment, the reformation, all the known revolutions and wars of the world. did they happened like a trinkle of sand in an hourglass? think about it.

well, that's for the whole month of august. you know, the chinese might may been right. august is really the most turbulent month.

buhay

Life is so sweet and bitter. sometimes our nostalgic and estatic on every good that comes to our life. but when bitterness come, it's like a hard pill to swallow. sometimes, when goodness comes, as if it is just an illusion that goes away so easy. if only life is ideal and no more pains and sufferings will ever happen. but i guess that's it, the sweetness of life is when bitterness comes. it will test your strength as a person. how i wish i was like that always amidst the terrible storms of my life.